Identity

IdentityAh, autumn nears…and I love this time of the year. It’s a time for deep contemplation, taking time to breath. As dusk deepens, everything goes a bit quiet.

It’s a good time for evaluation. It’s also a prime time for depression to grab hold.

And when they come together, it’s hell.

But as most of my personal hells, I find that journey through the dark burns the refuse out of my mind, leaving an open ground for new stuff to grow.

This week, I went from an emotional decision which I felt good about to the dread of knowing I needed to start over, again. I remained peaceful regarding the first half of my week. No regrets. I want to be present to friends who have found success, I’m going to be there for them. I will burn my envy into ash and blow it away.

The starting over part of the week sucked. Yet…my dear friend was right. I need to embrace what rests at the heart of my stories and celebrate it. Even if it means reinventing…well…everything. I’m both sides of this change right now. Egads…feeling a complete failure for missing the point for so long, dreading the work ahead of me. (Not your fault, dear friend, you told me over and over again and I didn’t see it.)

And starting over with – oh, wow – this is going to finally ring the right bell. I can’t wait to start.

The primal beat of what I write… Yes, my worlds are paranormal, when they aren’t fantasy, or involve time travel. Sometimes even aliens… But…in all of them… The driving pulse is the transformative power of sexual exploration.

I haven’t figure out how to say that in a brand statement, how to combine it with what the best of my reviews repeat – complex characters and excellent world building.

I have some work to do…and this is where I so wish I had access to a marketing/promotional professional.

A veritable challenge I am capable of meeting. A new series starts in March, 2016. I won’t wait that long to initiate change. I have some research to do. Like a composer, I need to put all of this together and make it hum… Autumn challenge…what fun!

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