Fear of the Fool

I play a fool in cyberspace. On FB, I’ll make wry comments and relate how I wandered all day with a shirt on inside out. I’ll babble on blogs about how muddled my head is, reveling in the chaos.

I am fearless with a keyboard.

Not so much in real life.

One of the things I hope to work on this year is the willingness to risk embarrassing myself in public, or appearing the fool.

Yes, I wear a pirate hat to conventions without a blink. I mean, that is my writer persona and it’s all about promotion.

And I look good in that hat!

And the purple pirate style coat.

Yes, it’s actually easier to play the ‘touched’ with a pirate hat on.

Something about the corners?

I have no idea. But perhaps any actors out there can relate. Put on a mask and you can dance the fandango without fear. Perhaps that is it.

But! In real life, I fret about looking a fool, falling on my face, being thought a total geek.

In October, I was at a convention on the east coast with a load of RWA friends. Moonlight&Magnolias. Those ladies do know how to party. Once the dance music came on after the awards dinner, it was a rush to the dance floor and the boogied all night.

I didn’t.

Sigh.

I wanted to, sorta. But I let my inner staid and proper nanny keep me to my chair, watching. And sometimes swaying. (It’s not that I can’t dance… I just…well…not sure what goes on in my head. Suffice to say, I didn’t dance. Not once.)

Not this year! This year, when I’m at the Romantic Times Booklovers Convention, in Chicago, in April and the music starts to play after the dinner…I’m gonna dance! With or without my pirate hat.

If you see me, haul me to my feet and don’t let me say no.

What do you fear looking a fool about?

2 Comments:

  1. Oh, I hear you. I hope this is the year that you can “dance like no-one is watching” in all aspects of your life. I just discovered No Lights No Lycra (http://nolightsnolycra.blogspot.com/), which is exactly that. And I have made the decision I am going to join up this year! (Well, after I’ve had the baby. I don’t know that arms and legs flailing in semi-darkness is an acceptable risk to an unborn child). Good luck shifting those inhibitions and embracing joy.

  2. Thanks, Naomi, for the encouragement. Sounds like No Lights No Lycra is a fun even and the perfect play to dance the fool into the ground. That is my plan!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*