When the Why Gets in the Way

Life is unfair, you know. It just is. Not because ‘life’ is vindictive. Not because there are forces out there determined to keep us down.

Honestly, life isn’t concerned with balancing the should and should not. Life…to be frank…doesn’t care. It doesn’t have the time…there is living to do.

I think of how sailors will speak with great poetry of the cruelty of the sea… But it isn’t cruel, it just has bigger concerns than the fleas floating on its surface.  It’s the humans who take it all so personal.

We all have that tendency. To look at what we aren’t getting, or what is happening TO us, and moan about how it isn’t fair. I’d pretty much say that we aren’t able to accept what is without assigning blame. Most of the times, we take that blame on ourselves.

Yeah, life isn’t fair. But the reality of things is that we aren’t fair to ourselves, ‘life’ has nothing to do with it.

I’m tired of taking on the blame.

Sometimes I’m right in what I do and sometimes I’m wrong. Something can be right in one instance and then wrong in another. Blame has nothing to do with it. Or fairness.

I need to take on the long perspective.

And I invite you to come along with me.

Brave girl jumping from the rocks in the evening on beautiful pu

Let’s dump the blame, and just keep moving forward.

You see, I have the bad habit of becoming so enamored with digging out the ‘why’ this is happening…and ‘how’ I set this up to happen…that I forget to keep moving. And I get stuck in this self-involved inner naval gazing of going nowhere. Life keeps moving and I don’t.

Yes, it’s important to figure things out so you don’t do it again. So you know when you need to apologize to others and when you need to forgive. Especially yourself.

Standing still is an awareness of what is…but if you stop breathing because the why is more important than breath…that is not living.

Spring is nearly here. I resolve to refocus outside myself.

What about you?


  1. Well said!!….and Happy St Paddys day.

  2. Thanks, sis! And happy St. Pat’s Day to you!

  3. This is very insightful. I’ve made a point to teach my child never to expect life to be fair. To me, letting her believe otherwise would be a disservice. But it’s very hard to remember our own insignificance in the big picture. I like this idea. Happy to join you on the journey.

  4. Yeah, I think the key is to fully embrace two philosophies. Both of which are true…

    Shit Happens
    Magic Happens

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