Okay, we all crave validation. I’m as bad as the next. But I don’t like this need in me and I’m working on eliminating it from my vocabulary.
Why this subject? Well, I was watching old Project Runways the other day and heard one of the finalists talking about how if she wins it will be validation that she really is a designer!
And I thought to myself, Woman, if you don’t believe that already, nothing is going to convince you!
I mean, really! She’s a finalist!
I also like to watch Chopped, another one where time and again, one of the chefs will spout off about winning will give them validation.
You know, if you don’t simply validate yourself then why the hell should you believe anyone else? I’m a big fan of the Shakespeare quote :
This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.
I really believe it works that way. Being true to yourself means you are true to others. But it’s also true that if aren’t true to your own self…well, why the hell should anyone else? If you love yourself and believe in yourself, then you’ll inspire others to believe in you, too.
I’m working really hard to follow thru on this with myself. It isn’t always easy. Yes, I’m published, with several more books on the way. But the thought that this is all some … I don’t know… masquerade still plays across my mind. And sooner or later, my mask is going to slip and everyone at the ball will turn and see that I don’t belong there.
Despite my knowing that I am an authentic author, I am published, I will continue to have books published and people will read (even if it’s not the landslide I’d dream of)..I doubt that any of it is real.
I don’t need validation.
No, I don’t need it. But I want it. Damn it.